Hey friends,
One of the biggest fears people have is that of getting rejected. It just feels like đ©. Sometimes itâs rejection from people, like that special someone, while other times itâs from companies and opportunities that you really wanted. In each case, it brings you down and takes a little bit of confidence out of you. Today I want to share how I think about rejections and what steps I take to minimize their impact on me.
Iâve been rejected a ton in my life; got rejected twice by Morgan Stanley, over 200 times by investors during fundraising, and countless times by instagram models (I should really stop sliding into DMs). Hearing these âNoâsâ never felt great, at least in the beginning, but over the years I got better at hearing them and facing them. Time for some math, shall we? đ€
Using baseball terminology, hereâs how I reduce the impact of rejections in my life:
Strikeouts - Learn from them and reduce them - strikeouts are rejections, they are part of life and youâre not going to be able to avoid them. So, learn to embrace rejections, itâs normal. Second, every time you get rejected, really think deep about the why. Why were you rejected? Doing a post-mortem of a situation after youâve been rejected is the only way to learn the facts and then evolve your strategy so you have a better chance of winning the next time around. Each time I got rejected from Morgan Stanley, I learned from it, changed my approach, applying another time with a slightly better strategy. Do this, again and again, and you will reduce the number of times you will strikeout.
At-Bats - Increase them - this is the main issue of why rejections impact some people more than others. Most people donât get on the plate enough times, so, every time they get rejected, it feels like a big deal. Increasing your denominator, the at-bats, will ultimately reduce the impact each rejection will have on you. This simply means that you must apply or take the shot multiple times. Want to work at a top investment bank or consulting firm? Apply to all of them. Want to raise a million dollars? Reach out to hundreds of venture capitalists and angel investors. Want to go on a date with a total smokeshow? Well, youâll need to muster up that confidence and ask as many of them out. The more smokeshows you ask out on a date, the less each humiliating rejection will impact you.
Self-Belief - finally, yes you can learn from your strikeouts or get more at-bats, but ultimately, youâll need to believe in yourself and know that one day, and that day may be far far away, you will win. You need to have this mindset every time you get rejected, each time you fall down, get back up, brush off the dust, get back on the plate, and know that youâll hit that next ball out of the park. Knowing that one day you will win makes each rejection feel, simply, temporary.
To end this weekâs note, I wanted to share with you a glimpse into my calendar. Summer is usually the busiest time for me as I am building partnerships with universities around the world. In the last few weeks Iâve done zoom calls with literally hundreds of organizations and have been rejected by a small number of them. But, given that I have so many at-bats, the rejections donât matter at all.
Hope this strategy works for you in whatever youâre chasing, and I really wish it reduces the impact of any future rejection in your life. All the best my friends! đ€
Sherjan
PS: please donât fill up your calendar like mine, this is not how most of my weeks look. A busy calendar doesnât give you time to think and reflect, thatâs a bad thing.
My Personal Mentor đ
This is my weekly podcast where I provide life & career advice and invite mentees of mine who have amazing journeys and life stories that we can all learn from. If you enjoy these emails, youâll hopefully like that too. You can listen here on Apple Podcast or any other podcasting app, just search for âMy Personal Mentorâ.
When to Be Yourself at Work (listen here)
On this episode we talk about how to still remain passionate within an organization and grow strategically without offending fellow co-workers.
Richard Henriques - Boeing, NASA Jet Propulsion Laboratory, and the journey to Personal Happiness (listen here)
On this episode of Story Time we have Richard Henriques. Richard was born in Los Angeles and has made it a mission of his to never leave the beautiful la la land. He went to Cal State Los Angeles and when there weren't a lot of employers hiring at his school, he took it upon himself and created a group to attract employers to the school. Through networking and building relationships with people far and wide, he broke into Boeing, then NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory, then Deloitte, and now at Internet Brands. His story is one of perseverance, staying focused on the long term goal, and being happy along the way. Tune in, it's Story Time!
â€ïž This Week
Podcast: Josh Kopelman - The Past, Present, and Future of Seed Investing - Josh Kopelman is one of the first investors in Uber and the founder of First Round Capital. Iâve met 100âs of VCâs in my recent years and to be honest, many of them are assholes. Josh, on the other hand, is who you want as your investor. He is empathetic, understands startups and founders at a deeper level, and someone Iâd love to call again for whatever I start next. This podcast of Invest Like the Best by Patrick OâShaughnessy is on my weekly listening routine and Iâd highly recommend it.
Video: Ray Dalio - How the Economic Machine Works - Ray Dalio, for those of you who donât know, is one of our times best investor and financial minds. His video on the economy and how it works should be compulsory for everyone to watch. We are currently going through a recession, and likely one that will turn into an economic depression, this video explains exactly why that is likely.
Quote of the Week
Failure will only make you stronger.
Videos this Week đŹ
Starting a Side Hustle - Starting a side hustle is one of the best ways to build your brand and do something that is uniquely you. It is a great way to get your creative juices to flow, do what you love, and make some cash while doing it. I've built quite a few businesses, including this channel and online network, while working as an investment banker. So, if I can do it with my busy schedule, you can definitely do the same...and most likely better than me!
Three Stages of Your Career - "What should I do with my career?" A lot of my mentees as me this question on a regular basis. In this video I describe what are the three stages of one's career and what you can do to excel in each. The first stage is Exploration, one where you should try everything you can and see what's out there. Second, is Going Pro; this is where you know what you love and you spend the next ten years learning everything about it. Finally, the last stage is becoming a Master at something. This is like becoming the Michael Jordan of X.
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